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Saturday, October 18, 2008

Chapter 53: Dealing With The Mess

"What the hell were you thinking?! Now I even have Mandy on my back saying what an horrible person you've become. What got into you Graham? Are you nuts?!?"

"I believed I've loved Keshia for a while now. I guess it was a forbidden love so I tried to bury those feelings inside hoping I'd be able to let go eventually. And I thought I did. I was so sure I was over it..."

"Humour me..."

"Maybe this wasn't a one night thing. Maybe what happened between Keshia and I wasn't to blame on alcohol. Maybe it was meant to be after all. It's been torturing me. To add to it all, Keshia kissed me at the hospital. I know she blamed it on being confused and scared and thinking I was Nathan but it reminded me what it was like, what it could be.

I love Alice, but Keshia...It's not the same. It's hard to wake up in the morning thinking she's with another man and she doesn't love me back. Alice, I'm sad that I'll lose her but I don't feel myself dying for her love. I want to be happy, I want her to be happy and I don't think either of us would be together."

"This is your second cancelled engagement. Not bad, for men like you, it's usually a second or third divorce. You can't have Keshia, I hope you realize that."

"Well, I'm not so sure. I think there is something. She's trying to hide from it but she always had feelings from him. If anyone could find out if I'm wrong it's you. Mandy is her best friend."

"You are officially out of your mind. You want my death. I've been avoiding the issue with Mandy for a full week. It always end in a fight. If you want my advice, you took a leap of faith, tried with Keshia already, didn't work; now you should move on and hope Alice will take you back."

"I don't want her back. I've made my decision. I just wanted to know what you think my next move should be."

"Graham, I'm dating Mandy...Keshia, Mandy both got closer to Alice since you guys got together. I can't really be advising you. But for the record, I think you shouldn't do anything. Just wait..."

"Great, not the answer I was hoping for. I'm gonna leave for about two months. You'll the only one that will know when and where to. I count on you to let everyone know how sorry I am for the mess I caused."


Graham gave Gary the details before walking away. He had to start this quest to find himself or lose himself forever.

Thursday, October 09, 2008

Chapter 52: Heartbroken

"You were not going to go through with it were you? You never had the intention of marrying, Graham, am I wrong?"

"Let's not talk about this now, Alice..."

"Oh, why not now? When would be a better time, please tell me. I'd love to know. Or should I go to Victoria to get all my answers since she seems to know a lot more..."

"Don't bring Victoria into this."

"You brought her into it, Graham. She knew, all along, she knew. She never minded me, I never really had you. No, she had you and then Keshia did. I was just a distraction between the two."

"It's not like that, Alice! I refuse to let you believe this is what it is. I do love you but my feelings for Keshia are different. Stronger."


Alice looked into Graham's eyes, she could see the shame and the pain.

"You were not going to marry me, Graham, I know. Because it would have been dishonest to lead me on this way. I just don't understand why you let it go this far though."

"I had every intention of marrying you, Alice, and being a great husband. The engagement was real, I meant every word when I asked you to marry me..."

"Oh, really? Like I was the only woman in this world you loved more than life? Bullshit!"

Graham took a step back; shocked. He'd known Alice for years and even when she was mad, she would never use a bad word. He had never seen her that way. She was in a total fury. There was no reasoning possible.

"I'm sorry, Alice...I thought all was settled and didn't realize I still had feelings for Keshia when I proposed. She's married and happy. I am engaged and also happy although you probably don't believe me.

I do need some time to think things over and understand what exactly is going on with me but if you'll be patient..."

"Graham, you better get out. I've never felt like this and I don't know what I might do."

"Alice..."

Graham reached out his hand to her but she pushed it and turned her back.

"GET OUT!!!"

Next post: Tuesday, October 14th, 2008
Chapter 53: Dealing With The Mess

Graham tries to get advice from Gary