Chapter 53: Dealing With The Mess

"What the hell were you thinking?! Now I even have Mandy on my back saying what an horrible person you've become. What got into you Graham? Are you nuts?!?"

"I believed I've loved Keshia for a while now. I guess it was a forbidden love so I tried to bury those feelings inside hoping I'd be able to let go eventually. And I thought I did. I was so sure I was over it..."

"Humour me..."

"Maybe this wasn't a one night thing. Maybe what happened between Keshia and I wasn't to blame on alcohol. Maybe it was meant to be after all. It's been torturing me. To add to it all, Keshia kissed me at the hospital. I know she blamed it on being confused and scared and thinking I was Nathan but it reminded me what it was like, what it could be.

I love Alice, but Keshia...It's not the same. It's hard to wake up in the morning thinking she's with another man and she doesn't love me back. Alice, I'm sad that I'll lose her but I don't feel myself dying for her love. I want to be happy, I want her to be happy and I don't think either of us would be together."

"This is your second cancelled engagement. Not bad, for men like you, it's usually a second or third divorce. You can't have Keshia, I hope you realize that."

"Well, I'm not so sure. I think there is something. She's trying to hide from it but she always had feelings from him. If anyone could find out if I'm wrong it's you. Mandy is her best friend."

"You are officially out of your mind. You want my death. I've been avoiding the issue with Mandy for a full week. It always end in a fight. If you want my advice, you took a leap of faith, tried with Keshia already, didn't work; now you should move on and hope Alice will take you back."

"I don't want her back. I've made my decision. I just wanted to know what you think my next move should be."

"Graham, I'm dating Mandy...Keshia, Mandy both got closer to Alice since you guys got together. I can't really be advising you. But for the record, I think you shouldn't do anything. Just wait..."

"Great, not the answer I was hoping for. I'm gonna leave for about two months. You'll the only one that will know when and where to. I count on you to let everyone know how sorry I am for the mess I caused."


Graham gave Gary the details before walking away. He had to start this quest to find himself or lose himself forever.

Chapter 52: Heartbroken

"You were not going to go through with it were you? You never had the intention of marrying, Graham, am I wrong?"

"Let's not talk about this now, Alice..."

"Oh, why not now? When would be a better time, please tell me. I'd love to know. Or should I go to Victoria to get all my answers since she seems to know a lot more..."

"Don't bring Victoria into this."

"You brought her into it, Graham. She knew, all along, she knew. She never minded me, I never really had you. No, she had you and then Keshia did. I was just a distraction between the two."

"It's not like that, Alice! I refuse to let you believe this is what it is. I do love you but my feelings for Keshia are different. Stronger."


Alice looked into Graham's eyes, she could see the shame and the pain.

"You were not going to marry me, Graham, I know. Because it would have been dishonest to lead me on this way. I just don't understand why you let it go this far though."

"I had every intention of marrying you, Alice, and being a great husband. The engagement was real, I meant every word when I asked you to marry me..."

"Oh, really? Like I was the only woman in this world you loved more than life? Bullshit!"

Graham took a step back; shocked. He'd known Alice for years and even when she was mad, she would never use a bad word. He had never seen her that way. She was in a total fury. There was no reasoning possible.

"I'm sorry, Alice...I thought all was settled and didn't realize I still had feelings for Keshia when I proposed. She's married and happy. I am engaged and also happy although you probably don't believe me.

I do need some time to think things over and understand what exactly is going on with me but if you'll be patient..."

"Graham, you better get out. I've never felt like this and I don't know what I might do."

"Alice..."

Graham reached out his hand to her but she pushed it and turned her back.

"GET OUT!!!"

Next post: Tuesday, October 14th, 2008
Chapter 53: Dealing With The Mess

Graham tries to get advice from Gary

Chapter 51: Tumbling Castles

Keshia was walking back and forth in the hospital hallway. Nathan was to be released today. He had massively improved and she was happy; she had still been by his side every day even after Graham told her the truth; but back then she could choose the time. Now that Nathan was coming back home she would no longer have the luxury of getting mentally prepared to see him.

She thought she was an horrible person. Having to be mentally ready to see her husband was horrible, but most of the time it was to keep her mind wandering to Graham. She remembered kissing him at the hospital when Nathan was first admitted. She'd felt guilty but didn't regret it completely.

Nathan had barely stepped in the house that he already wanted a romantic dinner. He ordered his wife to stay comfortable in the living room while he prepared everything. Keshia turned on the television trying to put her mind at ease and forget her inside turmoil.

She was just getting comfortable when the doorbell rang.

"Honey, would you answer that, please?"

"Of course, I want you concentrated on that diner."


She was in shock to see Graham at the door.

"Keshia, that was so unfair of me to tell you I loved you. I can't stop thinking about you; I know you are in love with Nathan...and married."

"This is not the moment, Graham. Nathan is..."

Before she even had a chance to continue, she heard a voice right behind her.


"Nathan is back home...I guess this is what she wanted to say. What is going on in here? Are you having an affair with Graham, Keshia?"

"No, Nathan! I'm definitely not."

"Can you explain to me what I just heard then?"

"Nathan, it's all me...I revealed to Keshia I loved her and I came here to apologize."

"What!?"

"Oh, my God, Alice!"

"Keshia; you're the one who was in his heart all this time...and you couldn't tell me?"

"Alice, it's not what you think. I didn't know until two days ago."

"Two days and you never cared to tell your husband?"

"Nathan..."


Keshia was speechless, Nathan and Alice were hurt and both seemed to blame her. Graham looked at Keshia and Alice.

"I'm sorry...I want to apologize to both of you. Also you, Nathan; Keshia is a wonderful woman. she didn't do anything wrong. Believe me, Nathan. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."


With that last sentence, Graham was gone.

Chapter 50: Getting The Truth

"I need to know something...is it true?"

"Sorry, Keshia, I'm not sure I follow you. Is what true?"

"I had a very interesting day, Graham. I went to see Victoria. I just had to. Not for old times sake that friendship is long dead but because I had to know..."

"To know what exactly?"

"Well, Victoria told me something and I have to admit she was always pretty good at judging characters most of the time...especially yours, Graham..."

"You went to see Victoria? I don't believe this...why?"

"This isn't about me, Graham...I had my reasons to see Victoria none that concern you or that you should even worry about. Although now that I've talked to her, there is something that concerns you and it's why I'm here."

"How can you trust anything that she says?"

"I don't, really; but I trust you."


Graham looked at Keshia...he loved her so much and he couldn't do anything about it. He had a certain idea of what she was about to ask but he still hoped she wouldn't. Victoria had threatened to tell Alice...

She had known all along that night he was protecting the woman he truly loved; the one he could never have. He couldn't help but wonder if Victoria had told Alice as well...She didn't come back home after her visit in jail. He stood to lose it all. Friendship, love..but could he lie?

"Ask away...I won't lie to you. But as a warning I would advise you not to ask anything you might not want to have the answer to."

"I need to know, Graham...are you in love with me?"


Keshia said it in a heartbeat. She wasn't sure she wanted the answer but she felt she had to know. No matter what the cost. Graham sighed and hid his face in his hands.


"I am, yes."

Keshia closed her eyes. Although Victoria had told her, it was different to hear it from Graham. There was one more thing she had to know. She tried to keep herself from asking but something came over her and she blurted it out; her mind filled with a number of emotions she couldn't control.

"That night...is it true you were trying to save me?"

"Oh, Keshia...I am so sorry. I never meant to hurt Nathan or anyone else. I just panicked when I saw Victoria with that gun. It was pointed right at you...but I would've saved Alice too or anyone else for that matter..."

"I have to go."


Keshia ran out of Graham's house in tears. Her husband had almost died when Graham tried protecting her. She was confused she couldn't control her emotions anymore. It was too hard to be confronted to the truth when deep down she was only certain of one thing and one thing only. She loved Nathan but Graham a lot more.

Next post: September 28th

Chapter 51: Tumbling Castles...

No guidelines, anything goes...

Chapter 49: She Knows It All

"Wow, you made it!"

"Cut the sarcasm, I'm not happy to be here."

"Really?"

"The things I'd do to you, Victoria if we were alone..."

"Is this a threat?"

Keshia laughed.

"For the sakes of the guards being there, let's say it's a sexual proposition"

"Oh, smart...you're rising up to the ultimate smart bitch level."

"Guess I learned from the best...Well, actually it's a typical case of student getting better than the Master. Maybe because that Master had no heart."

"Go to hell, Keshia! I never thought you'd set foot in here. I know you hate me, why come torture me?"

"I'm torturing you? You should've been an actress! Victoria, you almost killed my husband! You wanted to hurt my friends. How pathetic have you become crashing a party you were not even invited to. You will never get Graham back. Get over it, move on!"

"I know, I'll never get Graham back! You know why? "

"Because he's finally opened her eyes, Vicky. You're no good for him. Now he's with Alice and he's happy. They are happy. Of course you couldn't accept that, you had to try to ruin it."

Is that what you think? I know I can't get Graham back but not because he wants to marry Alice; because of someone else..."

"Really, who would that be?"

"Don't tell me you're so blind. Obviously it's because of YOU! He loves you!"

Keshia looked at Victoria in disbelief.

"You seem a little surprised. Come on, didn't you realize? I wasn't aiming at Alice, I was aiming at you. Graham knows it very well. How's Nathan? Did I do Graham a favor?"

"YOU BITCH!!! You're unbelievable. I'm leaving...I hope you rot in jail for the rest of your life. I'll be there at your trial testifying what an horrible person you are.

Guards! Get me out of here!"

Victoria laughed. Keshia may be mad but her testimony might help if her lawyer was smart enough to turn it around and states that it shows a trouble character.

Graham was indeed in love with Keshia, Alice was just smoke he was blowing in everyone's eyes. He couldn't even admit it to himself.

Oh, they would be unhappy. Now with Keshia knowing, she'd torture herself since she thought Graham was the man for her once. Nathan well, he might just end up as another war casualty. She may even be around to comfort him.

Next post: September 20th

Chapter 50: Getting The Truth

Keshia confronts Graham...

Chapter 48: "Welcoming" The Visit

"Now what brings you here? Of all people you're almost the last one I'd expect to see. There's just one above you."

"I had the feeling that other someone was Graham but I must be wrong.."

"No, not Graham. I know him, he's predictable.. Poor Alice, you still don't know your man quite well as I do."

"Well what difference does it make really when he wants me not you. Plus you're here, desperate, rotting in a jail cell. How does it feel?"

"Ooh, fierce! And I didn't think you had it in you until you thought you had to call to let me know you were getting Graham for life. Let me tell you something Missy. You don't have him, you never had him and never will. He doesn't even know it but his heart belongs to someone else. Someone he can't have. I know him by heart, Alice, always will."

Alice looked at Victoria with pity...

"You are dillusional. You will probably avoid jail if you plead insanity and that wouldn't even be a trick. Think you know Graham so well huh? Or is it because you just saw him a moment ago and you think I don't know? Oh but I do Victoria, I do know he was here."

"Why did you come here, Alice? Really? Don't avoid my question again."

"I just needed to know. Hear it from you; why?"

"Haha, you know that it could hurt my defence if I tell you anything...but I'm in a mood to be nice today."

"Really? Could've fooled me!"

"Funny. I was there and did what I did because you called me. On some unconcious level that is what you were looking for."

"No I was not!"

"You don't know yourself very well Alice. You were always the invisible one and finally you weren't. You had won over a girl like me. You... The world had to know, it had to be big; if not what would be the point of it all? So you called me, you needed me there, you wanted me there where everyone could see who was on top.

You were expecting a scene just not of that magnitude. I admit it, I lost it. But you needed me there so in the end I kinda did it for you. To make you feel relevant, alive, like you matter. Admit it to yourself you're no better than me and I actually admire you for that. You're not as stupid as I thought and not a goody two shoes either."

"Good luck, Victoria! Nothing good will ever come out of your life at the rate you're going."

Alice waived at the guard she was ready to leave.  She left without looking back.

Chapter 47: Hard To Get Over

"You can't let this consume you, Alice...I don't recognize you anymore."

"Graham...I'm sorry but I can't do this. Whenever I look at you, I play the scene over in my head. I know it's all my fault."

Graham approached Alice from behind and tried wrapping his hands around her shoulders but she pulled away.

"Don't...I know Nathan is alright, Keshia forgives the both of us and I love you; please believe it. It's just too hard. It feels like something inside me is broken and I'll never get it back. There is also something I did not tell you yet...

I have an appointment to meet with Victoria at the detention center. A 30 minutes visit, tomorrow at 3 pm. I know I should've told you, but I couldn't. Just the mere mention of her name seems to drive you into one of these rage. I'm not the only one who's changed."

"Well, if we're coming clean, I have to tell you I also have an appointment with her. At 2:30 pm tomorrow also so we would've probably crossed each other's path...What's happening to us? You know that I still love you, right, Alice? I'm sorry if I act crazy at times if I seem different or aggressive. I promise to work on it; I don't want to lose you."

"I'm not sure what's going on Graham or even if we can save our couple."

"But what do you want from me Alice? Or from Victoria for that matter? Redemption? This is it! If we can't work it out, we never will!"

"Once again...you are getting mad and impatient. I need to think. I'll see you later tonight."


And she was out the house, leaving Graham lonely and confused. He had been impatient lately. He also did lose his temper over little things. He loved Alice but nothing was the same; not for him, not for her.

He also had to deal with that obsession with Keshia. That's what it was he had no other words to describe it. What kind of person did that make him? He almost killed her husband and now realizes he has feelings for her?

It was imperative he tried to save his relationship with Alice. He had to forget about Keshia. The quicker the better.

Chapter 46: Waking Up

"You know how they say your whole life flashes before your eyes when you're close to dying?"

"Yes, honey, I've heard that before..."

"Well, that wasn't true for me. Only one imaged flashed and it was yours...Happy, sad, then happy again. Luckily the last one I can remember before blacking out, what one of you happy. Smiling...our wedding. I knew right then I could die because I'd bring your memory with me."

"Oh, Nathan, you are so sweet."

"Everyday I'm thankful and reminded I made the best decision of my life when I made you my wife, Keshia."

"You are going to make me blush...I love you."

"And I love you too, Sweety."


Keshia and Nathan kissed while Graham stood in the room entrance. For whatever reason, he was a little jealous...


"Graham! How long have you been standing there? Come say hi!"

"Yes, sure, I don't bite. At least not yet. There's still serving me food through intravenous. I'll have to show the doctor's I can't live on that."

Nathan laughed and Graham smiled.

"Wow, well you sure seem to be doing great, Champion!"

"Feeling much better that's for sure, great, yeah, sure. Now you just have to convince my wife. She thinks I'm still fragile. Do I look like I'm gonna break? It takes a lot more than that crazy woman you were engaged to to stop me.

I forgot to ask...Is Alice okay?"

"Yes, she is. Thanks for asking. Unfortunately or fortunately you were the only one hurt. If I had it my way, no one would've been hurt..."

"Let's not talk about that now. It's depressing and I'm in a great mood. Can't wait to be out of bed and kick your ass at tennis again."

"Ha! Still think you can beat me? I'm thinking of going pro. That's how much you've boosted my self esteem."

Nathan laughed. He had told Graham he was one of the best amateur tennis players ever but anytime they'd played. Graham would win.


"And where do you think you are going?"

"I'm leaving you boys alone for now, don't want to butt in."

"A nice butt like yours gets to meddle in my business anytime. That's why I married you, remember?"

"You're silly."

"And I don't want you to leave..."


Graham interrupted the couple that was once again all over one another.

"I was leaving anyways. Nathan I'll come visit you soon again. Take care of yourself"

"That is if they let me. Obviously the doctors here think they know how bet than I do."


Graham laughed and left the room. He didn't feel like laughing at all. For whatever reason, seeing Keshia wirh Nathan and closer than ever, made him more jealous than any other time.

Chapter 45: Admission Of Guilt

"Keshia, I've been trying to reach you all morning!"

"I slept through the whole day, Never heard the phone, I'm sorry, Graham. I was listening to my messages right before you called again."

"Can we meet and talk? It's important."

"Well...sure, can you bring me to the hospital? I have to see Nathan, my mother-in-law says there's great news but she didn't want to add more. She just told me to come as soon as possible."

"Sure, I'm on my way, Keshia. I'd love to talk to Nathan too if he's awake."



"So, tell me, Graham. What was so urgent?"


Keshia looked more like herself, confident and beautiful. Alexandra, her mother-in-law had told her Nathan was awake and asking for her. She was impatient to see her husband awake and well.


"Did you speak to the detective, yet?"

'No, I didn't have any time to return my calls yet. I mostly just wanted to see my husband, My Nathan is awake, can you believe it? I'm sooo happy; you couldn't believe it."

"Well, after Alice had her accident, I remember how I felt when she was at the hospital and when she got better. I know how you feel. It's hard knowing you might lose the one you love. But when they pull through, your bond and your love is stronger than ever. You don't take any moment for granted."

"I want Victoria to pay, Graham..."


Keshia said the last words in a very calm manner but Graham could hear the hate and anger in her voice, He had to tell her now about what had really happened.


"Keshia, I had a talk with the detective... There's no easy way to say this and I'm very sorry. The forensics analysis have all been done..."

"Why would he notify you of any of this, Graham?"

"Because... I am the one who pulled the trigger, Keshia. I am sorry. I don't know how it happened."


Graham was walking with Keshia towards the hospital doors as he said those words and stood right next to the hospital entrance with tears in his eyes, He had almost killed a man; a friend. He could've shot any of his guests and he was even lucky Nathan made it. He brutally punched the brick wall and blood started spilling.

"Graham!"


Keshia went right next to him and hugged him.


"I still blame Victoria. Without her, none of this would've happened. Nathan is alive and well. It was an accident."

"You don't understand, I wanted to hurt Victoria on some level, I might have put my finger on the trigger thinking I could kill her!"

"Graham, don't talk no sense. Let's get you to a doctor, you are bleeding. Everything will be fine. If you're looking for forgiveness, you have mine and I sure believe you'll have Nathan's. Don't worry about any of this for now and don't tell Nathan yet."

"I told Gary and I told you. Alice doesn't even know yet. I wanted to make sure you heard it from me first."

"Thanks Graham, I'd stay with you but I have to go see my husband. Come by the room when they fix your hand."

"Sure will."


Graham looked at her leaving. She sure was an amazing person. Nathan was lucky to have her. He remembered that one night they'd spent together years ago. If it hadn't been for Victoria back then and the guilt he felt after, she would've been the perfect girl.

Chapter 44: Very Bad News

"What happens now?"

"Well, I highly doubt you will be charged with anything. It was accidental."

"But I could be charged, right?"

"Well, it is always a possibility but it's unlikely I think. A good lawyer won't let it hold up passed the preliminary hearing. It would be an aberration."


But Gary, whether or not I am charged, I still have to live with the guilt knowing I am the one who pulled the trigger."

"Graham, maybe technically you pulled the trigger, but it was by accident. It was never your intention to hurt anyone."

"If you really want to know, what scares me is beyond my worries of charges, trial or anything else. It's what you just stated. That my intent wasn't to hurt anyone. I wouldn't have mind if Victoria had been hurt."

"Please don't repeat this to anyone; I don't like the sound of it. Did you get a chance to speak with Alice?"

"Well, she's all wrapped up into thinking this is her fault. And now I'm finding out, it's mine. I should go see Keshia, hopefully Detective Crane hasn't been able to reach her yet."


Graham felt like a monster. He had no idea what to tell Keshia, he just knew he should tell her he was responsible for Nathan's condition before the detective did. Hopefully she'd forgive him.

As he arrived to the hospital, he saw Keshia looking at Alice with disbelief.

"Are you that naive? You still couldn't figure out what kind of woman Victoria is? You risked your life...all of our lives... But I can't be mad at you, Alice; you didn't know better."


Alice had told Keshia she had spoken to Victoria right before the incident. Although Keshia was so understanding of Alice's mistake, Graham still doubted she'd be so comprehensive when she would learn he pulled the trigger. Whether the information came from the detective or him.

Chapter 43: All Better?

"My dear, Keshia, my flight kept on being delayed. I rented a car and my phone battery was dead. I wanted to arrive as soon as possible so I didn't want to stop. Any news? How's my son?"

Nathan's mom was always grounded and calm. The typical example of someone who followed their head rather than their heart. Deep down she was probably as shaken up as Keshia but on the outside; it'd be hard to tell. She could almost appear cold.

"I have great news, Alexandra, I left you tons of messages. He's awake! We can't see him for the moment. They want to run some more tests tomorrow. You don't need to stay here. You can go rest at the house; I'll give you the keys. I'll call you as soon as I hear more."

"Keshia, honey, I can tell you're exhausted. Nathan is my son. I'll be more than happy to stay at the hospital and watch over him. You go home and get some sleep. Nathan needs you strong and rested."

"Yes, but..."

"No buts, Keshia. Go home. Wait for my call or come back in a few hours. I can assure you, I'll let you know if anything comes up."

"Thanks, Alexandra."


There was no arguing with Alexandra. This was both good and bad. Keshia used to feel very little in her presence. Now it wasn't so bad. They hugged and Keshia left the hospital. On her way out, she bumped into Graham.


"Keshia, are you okay? Have you slept at all in the last 48 hours?"

"No, not really. I haven't been home yet."

"Let me drive you. You could definitely use a time out. I haven't heard from you all night. How's Nathan?"

"Well apparently he's awake. I was not allowed to see him yet. They need to run some tests this morning."

"That's good news. He's made it through the worst."

"I doubt it. What about brain damage? Imagine if he's in a vegetative state? Or if he regresses and ends up like a child? I don't think I could deal with it."

"Please, Keshia....Take it one day at a time. You love Nathan, he loves you. You will overcome anything.

There's your stop. I'll go back to the hospital in case there's anything."

"My mother in law is already there....I don't want to be alone. Will you stay a moment please?"

Graham hesitated. Keshia was in a fragile mental state and he didn't want something similar to what happened the other night to repeat itself. But he also understood her need of not being alone.

"Sure. I'll make you a herbal tea and make sure you go to bed."

"Thanks, Graham."

Chapter 42: Insanity

"Well, if we can enter a plea of insanity, you would be much better off. Right now you might be accused of attempted murder and charges could be added"

"The question is: I am the one who pulled the trigger? Don't they have a forensic team working to figure out what happened?"

"Ms. Lane, please, you have to listen to me. You could be facing one count of attempted murder on the person of Alice McCarth. You could be facing more charges for Nathan Long. If the preliminary hearing doesn't go well for us; and I doubt it will, I believe you should enter a plea of insanity.."

"Obviously, you are the one not listening to me. Alice doesn't deserve to live I don't need your services anymore. I know a far better lawyer."



"You must be joking, right?"

"Victoria, please forget my number. Forget I ever existed. I never ever wish to hear from you. Oh, no, sorry, that's not what I meant. I'm actually hoping the last I ever hear from you is when I find out you've been locked up and they've thrown away the key."

"Gary, gary! I need a lawyer."

"Yes, and a good one, I'll add."


Gary hung up. The nerves of that woman. He had just been interviewed by the detective and was heading to the hospital.



"How's Nathan?"

"He was badly injured. The doctors don't know if he'll make it. Keshia is in the room with him now. Mandy is with Alice. She's feeling guilty because she thinks Victoria came because she provoked her. I don't know how to convince her otherwise."

"What a mess. How is Keshia holding on?"

"She's a little out of it. Trying to be strong but it's getting harder to keep up the act. Also I have to keep Alice from telling Keshia she talked to Victoria. Timing isn't quite perfect."

"Speaking of which, Victoria called me asking if I could be her lawyer."

"Is she out of her mind?"

"Frankly, I think she is. Any good lawyer will tell her to plead insanity; although she just fired her lawyer for telling her to plead insanity."

"She's not getting out for a while then, is she?"

"She'd need much more than a lawyer to get out of this one. A miracle worker probably couldn't help her. Graham, I know this is not the time or the place, but you should look for counsel just in case..."

"I don't understand, why?"

"I can't assure your defense because I am a potential witness. If the police investigation proves you fired the gun that injured Nathan; they could prosecute you."

"Would they?"

"I highly doubt it but it's very much a possibility."


Graham was about to ask Gary another question when he heard a code blue call to the ICU. Keshia stepped back in the waiting room.


"They told me to step out. Please God, he has to be alright."

Chapter 41: Confession

"Graham! I arrived as soon as I could. Mandy was just starting her interrogation when I left. How is Nathan?"

"I don't know, Alice, he got out of surgery just a moment ago. Keshia is talking to the doctor as we speak. I'm worried about her."

"Yes, it must be very hard to know you might lose the one you love."

For a moment Graham wondered if Alice had any idea how it felt. He could remember so clearly when she was laying on her hospital bed after her car accident or when Victoria pointed the gun towards Alice. He knew what it felt like; he could feel Keshia's pain.

"The detective asked a lot of questions..."

"I know, I guess he wants to be able to picture as accurately as possible tonight's events."

"Yes, probably. He'll want to speak to Keshia as well."

"Naturally...I'm sorry, Alice, this small talk is just not doing it for me. Let's just hold each other."


Graham held Alice tightly. If he could have it his way, he thought, he would never let her go.

"There is something I need to tell you, Graham..."

"Honey, it'll have to wait. Keshia seems distraught. She needs us now."


Graham walked quickly towards Keshia.

"[..]next few hours will tell it all."

"But he's alive isn't he?"

"Like I said before, he's hanging by a thread but yes."

"But you'll save him, right?"


Graham put his hand over Keshia's shoulder and asked the doctor to stay. He walked her to Alice so she wouldn't be alone and went back to the doctor.

"Doctor, I don't think she is in a state of mind where she will pay attention to any of what you are saying. How bad is it?"

"The bullet caused a lot of damage. Even if he does survive, we don't know the extend of brain damage. The chances he will make it through the night are very slim. I know Mrs. Long wants to hold on to the to the hope a miracle will happen but frankly, I doubt it. She will be able to see her husband for a few minutes in a moment. If you'll excuse me, I have to leave. I'll be back a little later."

"Thanks, doctor."



"He's alive, Graham, he's alive! It's all that matters; Nathan is alive."

"Yes, he's alive Keshia."

Graham looked at Alice, They both were not sure how to react. Keshia would clearly not accept Nathan's death if he didn't make it. They had both run out of comforting words when a nurse came by to bring Keshia to Nathan's bed head.


"Graham, now that we're alone, I really need to tell you something. I don't want you to find out from anyone else."

He had never seen that look in Alice's eyes before, he didn't know what to think.

"I am responsible for all that happened tonight. I am to blame. I should be lying on that bed, not Nathan Long. That bullet was meant for me."

"Don't ever say that Alice. It's not your fault. Although you asked me to let Victoria on stage, I didn't have to. I don't know what I would've done if I had lost you. Nathan is strong. He'll make it. You cannot be held responsible for Victoria's actions."

"Even if I provoked it?"

"What do you mean, provoked it?"

"She called a few hours before we left. Desperately wanted to speak with you. I told her we were getting ready for our engagement party and to never call the house again. That if there was anything she could or should do would be to right her wrongs. She knew about the engagement because I told her. She was there because I "invited" her."

Chapter 40: The Hardest Part

Keshia hated hospitals. She hated the colors, the smell, the constant coming and going. She was all alone in a small waiting room trying to be strong; hoping if she didn't cry, it didn't make it real, that she'd wake up somewhere else. Anywhere so long as she'd be in Nathan's arms.

Two hours. She had been waiting two long excruciating hours when the door to the operating room finally opened. A young nurse stepped out. Keshia ran towards her.

"How is he? How's my husband?"

"I'm sorry. I'm not allowed to give you any information on the patient's condition, it's the hospital's policy. You'll have to wait for the doctor."

"Which doctor? I don't see any. This is a hospital and yet, I don't see any doctors. I barely see nurses! Please help me!"

Keshia was screaming. She was partly mad but mostly scared and just emotionally unstable. The nurse could feel her distress. She took her hand and invited her to take a seat.

"Listen, as soon as the surgery's over, I can assure you the doctor will come speak with you. In the meantime, you should get some sleep. You look exhausted. It may take another hour or more. I'll get you a glass of water and see if I can find a room where you can rest.

"No, thanks. You are very kind. I'd rather wait here."


Keshia opened her eyes. She didn't recall falling asleep. Graham was standing in the waiting room, his back against a wall.


"I arrived as soon as I could. I've been here about 10 minutes. I haven't heard anything yet. How is he?"

"I don't know. He's still in surgery. Why won't they tell me anything?"


Graham sat next to Keshia; she leaned her head on his shoulder as he gently stroked her hair. Keshia thought of how Nathan would do that whenever she was feeling low. Half asleep, half awake, she locked lips with Graham. Within a second; realizing what had just happened, Keshia jumped out of her seat.


"Sorry, Graham, I...sorry."


She ran outside, it was raining but she didn't care. She badly needed some air. She didn't mean to kiss Graham, for a moment she thought he was Nathan and everything was alright; her wish had come true. Keshia quietly fell on her knees and cried. Did it count with all the rain? She couldn't even tell her tears apart from the raindrops. She had promised to be strong, but that was the hardest part of it all. She got herself back together just as Graham arrived.

"I thought you were Nathan; I'm sorry."

"Don't worry about it Keshia. Here, put on my jacket and come inside. You are freezing, Nathan wouldn't forgive me if I didn't look after you. The doctor asked for you; he is out of surgery."